Dave’s Ramblings – Another Postcard From Baku
Last night we discovered that Baku is basically a giant themed shopping mall that got out of hand. There’s the Phone Case District, the Curtain Kingdom, the Realm of Infinite Pots and Pans, and—most sacred of all—the Pub Zone.
We power-walked through the land of textiles like action heroes, because priorities. Yes, we secured all our haberdashery dreams on one glorious street. Buttons, ribbons, thread—the works.
Honestly, it felt like Christmas… if Santa was really into curtains and craft supplies and also handed out pints.
On our way home from the pub, proudly clutching our glorious haul of haberdashery like victorious Viking traders, we stopped for a kebab – because apparently in Baku this is not a choice, it’s a legal obligation.
The place we found at 1:00am had jars of chillies on the table. Innocent-looking. Cheerful. Lurking. Pete, in a moment of heroic overconfidence, decided to try one.
What followed was a symphony of distress:
“I can’t breathe.”
“My head’s going to explode.”
“I can hear… rumbling. Inside. Is that normal?”
Meanwhile, he was changing skin colour faster than a chameleon at a disco. I genuinely thought we might need to call an ambulance – or at least an exorcist.
But he survived. And the kebab was excellent in case you are wondering.
The weather outside is grey and miserable, a bit like that one sock that comes out of the laundry mysteriously damp, even though everything else is dry and you start questioning your entire life’s choices. In fact when I looked out first thing I thought the world has chosen ‘depressed porridge’ as today’s colour palette.
The traffic remains crazy, the horns are still beeping away like a tone-deaf orchestra – the kind where nobody knows the song, everyone thinks they should be the conductor, and the only consistent rhythm is pure chaos. Yes, it’s just another Baku morning, where even the pigeons look stressed.
First order of the day is to shower. Trying to navigate the unique system in this apartment and still have some skin left is a challenge.
The water temperature runs on pure chaos – one second I’m being boiled like pasta, the next I’m starring in a survival documentary called “Naked in the Arctic: The bathroom edition.” At this point I’m not certain I’m even showering – I’m just negotiating with plumbing.
This morning’s topics include:
Where to have breakfast, what to eat, how to get to the game, how to get back from the game, where to have dinner…
And you thought this football thing was easy! Following Chelsea over land, sea (and Leicester!) isn’t just about watching 22 people chase a ball. It’s logistics, strategy, nutrition planning, transportation management, emotional resilience, and at least three arguments about whether now is an appropriate time for a kebab. (It is by the way!)
Honestly, football fans don’t get enough credit. We’re basically travel agents with trust issues and snack priorities.
Dave M
‘Chelsea Supporters Group’ can also be found on X and Facebook and Bluesky
